Divorce Is Not An Option: Tips For Improving Christian Marriage Relationships

Many Christian couples feel that marriage is a sacrament and that divorce is generally contrary to God's plan. However, they may be disheartened to find that they are still having contention and problems in the marriage. Follow these tips to improve your relationship and strengthen your marriage.

Improve Your Worship

The first thing you and your spouse need to do is improve your study of the gospel and your activity in your congregation.

            Pray daily individually and with your spouse.

            Study the scriptures with your spouse.

            Join and actively participate in a small group Bible study.

            Sit together in church meetings; don't put the kids between you.

            Try to improve each day.

Foster Unity and Equality

Many couples have a hard time figuring out their roles as husband and wife, especially since they know that the husband is the head of the household. Have a discussion with your spouse and ask him if he thinks God loves men more or women less. Once you agree that God loves all of his children equally, you can understand that having the man as the head of the household is simply God's way of organizing. It does not mean that men are better than women.

You must learn to share leadership in the home. Both husband and wife must have an understanding of and partial control of decision-making, money management, problem solving, teaching children and disciplining children.

This means that you need to spend a lot of time together discussing these topics. You need to talk about what your goals are and create steps for how you are going to reach them. Marriage is not passive. You must actively take part in continuously strengthening it.

Respect is absolutely necessary to a strong marriage. If you respect someone, are you going to talk badly about him or her to your friends? No. Do not fall in to the trap of complaining about your spouse to your friends, which shows a lack of respect. If there is a problem, then talk to your spouse so that you can fix it together! The marriage covenant is between you, your spouse and God. Do not invite your friends into the marriage bed.

Who is Winning?

When there is contention in your home you need to think about who is winning. Is there an argument about how to use money? Who is winning and who is losing? Do you really want your marriage to be about keeping score and tracking points? The only one who is winning when there is fighting and contention is the devil. The only real way that you will win is if your spouse is right there at your side. 

To learn more, speak with a marriage counselor like Robbins Tim Counseling. 

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